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All Deviations
All Deviations

To a Fatherless Son by ~FrederickNeeds:iconFrederickNeeds:



You will be aware of a void
growing besides you like a tree.
An oak tree gauged out hollow,
The dead leaves at your feet and
branches stretching to a sunless sky
like a miserable finger pointing
to where something used to be.
©2007-2008 ~FrederickNeeds
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Submitted: May 19, 2007
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~tentactically:icontentactically: Jun 24, 2007, 9:50:11 PM
i like the last two lines the best

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something about a nightmare
~marvellousdark:iconmarvellousdark: Jun 29, 2007, 9:30:46 AM
Och, how bleak. There's only so much that can be said with the brevity of the poem, but I'd say the one tree metaphor, with all those elongated figures (the finger pointing - accusatory, maybe), is well done. It certainly fills me, a fatherless son, with some dread.

PS. From the little I have read, you stench of Blake.
~FrederickNeeds:iconFrederickNeeds: Jun 30, 2007, 6:34:45 AM
Yeah I do stink of Blake. He's an idol of mine :)

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"If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur."